To the Mothers Struggling With Depression on Mother’s Day.

Mother's Day in the U.S. is during the month of May which also happens to be Mental Health Awareness month. No matter how you feel, you deserve to be celebrated on this day too.
Mother’s Day in the U.S. is during the month of May which also happens to be Mental Health Awareness month. No matter how you feel, you deserve to be celebrated on this day too.

You might be apprehensive about the upcoming Mother’s Day.  You’re not sure what you’ve done to even deserve to be celebrated on that day.  You make think that you haven’t done much to prove you’re a good mother.  You may not feel like such a great Mama with how you’re feeling.

You may have been lost in a fog more than you liked.   The lows seem to be greater than the high points. You may be finding yourself fighting back tears more often than you like or during moments that don’t make sense.  Or even trying to summon every ounce of strength to just not fall apart in front of the people you love.

You do deserve this day, just as much as any mother/mother figure.

I’m here to remind you that this is just a small moment in the grander scheme of things.  I think it’s easier to pick apart all the lower and bad moments from the good ones and carry them with you.  Those good moments seem so faint when the weight of the bad moments make it hard to move forward.  Those good moments, they are there.

The brief periods where you mentally prepare yourself with a quick prayer or pep talk and can make it out the door to work.  Days where you would rather pull the covers over you but opt for a morning at the park with your kids.  For a brief moment, you have the laughter of your kids and genuine smiles to give you more hope and give you another reason to keep moving forward.  Those sessions with your doctor where you suddenly realize a major jump you’ve made in progress and that YES, you can do this.  Yes, those good moments are there.

Some days are definitely better than others. Some days it’s easier to pull yourself from that fog.  You really do deserve this day Mama.

You are fighting.

You are trying.

You are giving as much love as you can.

You’re trying to figure out how to cope and be present.

You ARE a loving Mama.

Happy Mother’s Day, you deserve this day, regardless if you’re trying to find ways to cope, are in the darkest holds of depression, or seeing positive results from everything you have been doing.  Keep fighting as best as you can. Remember to celebrate the small victories because they begin to add up to bigger ones.

If you need immediate help, please call the National Suicide Hotline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255)

If you are looking for pregnancy or postpartum support and local resources,

please call or email:

Call PSI Warmline (English & Spanish) 1-800-944-4PPD (4773)

Email support@postpartum.net

or visit http://www.postpartum.net/

signed, dee

Mental Health Quote

How becoming a mama has made me feel beautiful.

My kids have shown me to see the beauty within myself.

My transition to mamahood hasn’t been an easy or smooth one but it has given me so much in terms of personal growth.  Mamahood has changed my life in many ways. It has especially made me unapologetic of myself – flaws, quirks, and all.

I was one of those awkward girls growing up.  It seemed to be especially apparent during middle school and high school.  I know a lot of people say this, but I really didn’t feel that I fit in. Thanks to genes I was skinny, very light skinned compared to my peers, and shy.  Add being mixed race in a community where there were a handful of us – it made me feel self conscious.  I didn’t look like anyone else and people made sure to point it out.  When I would receive compliments, I would just have a blank stare or laugh it off.  I never saw myself as beautiful, pretty, gorgeous, or anything closely related.  Probably the hardest things for me was trying to navigate through life and accepting the person I was – quirks, strengths, looks, etc.  Even writing this post has taken some time to be able to verbalize my thoughts.  It’s been sitting in my drafts for almost a month.

Becoming a mother changed that for me.  It was no longer about myself or worrying about how I looked.   It was about this tiny and fragile human that was delicately handed to me.  I see pieces of me in each of my children.  The same pair of lips and skin on my first and the same large eyes and smile in my second.  I see the silly sense of humor I have budding with my first.  Then there is the determination I have that I’m beginning to see with my second.

Tee from: parentees.co
Tee from: parentees.co

 

I’ve had my ups and downs with accepting myself.  The one thing that has been constant through out all of this is God’s presence.  I would find myself feeling so low but managing to pull myself out of it once I poured my heart and thoughts to the Lord.

Proverbs 3:5-6New International Version (NIV)

Trust in the Lord with all your heart
    and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways submit to him,
    and he will make your paths straight.[a]

Placing that trust in Him, with all my heart, has given me the blessing of my beautiful kids.  Being blessed with both my children has only intensified that faith that I have.  Time and time again He has given me tests to show me my worth, my own beauty, the beauty that he has given me.  My children have been able to open my eyes and extend this further. They have shown me that they love me and see the beauty in me.  This is regardless of what I’m going through, what I’m trying to over come, or how I may see myself sometimes.  My children have pushed me – with God’s help.   There will no longer be apologies regarding who I am.  I am moving towards accepting my flaws, embracing what makes me unique, and starting to look at myself as beautiful – as God has made me.